Overestimate. Underestimate.

We all do this. We overestimate what we can do in a short amount of time, but underestimate what we can do in the long run. Don’t do this. Build habits to help you stay consistent and reach each goal! Take a listen to build healthy habits and hear a little bit about my 2021.

Podcast Transcript
I love podcasts. I listen to one almost every day while I am getting ready and if I am driving to the office. I started with Tony Robbins. I fell in love with his energy and message, as many of you probably have as well. He has so many good one liners and quotes, but the one that I cannot get out of my head is this, “I overestimate when I can get done in a year and underestimate what I can get done in a decade.” This quote continually gives me hope and keeps me pushing forward. Last year at this time, Something Better, My Darling was not even a thought in my brain. Not at all. I never once wanted to have my own business. And I surely didn’t think I was qualified enough to help women when I felt like I was a hot mess. Then in a matter of a few weeks my life changed for the better. Check out “The Catalyst” episode for the full details, but after an amazing vacation with my best friend Laura for my 40th birthday, my heart was broken. It was the third strike. Or, the third cut on my heart. More on that later.

My last year went something like this:

• In January, Laura and I head to Punta Cana to celebrate my 40th birthday. We had an amazing time and I met a man who I thought was my forever. After all, before the trip I prayed for something big to happen. A husband from Switzerland seemed pretty big to me. LOL. 
• In February, I was ghosted by my forever man. Clearly not my forever man. I did a lot of crying, praying, meditating, and reading. Specifically I read a devotional called Daring Faith by Rick Warren which led me to reading his book, “Purpose Driven Life.”
•  On March 18th,  I messaged Laura at 2:38 am –  “I can’t sleep, I’m so excited!!!! My soul is on fire.!!! Call me when you get the boys to school.” This was the night Something Better, My Darling was created. It all came to me in a flood and I knew exactly what I was created to do. Help women be confident and reach their full potential. I built a website and launched the Instagram and FB pages. 
• In April I wrote the first draft of the workbook for Something Better, My Darling and launched this podcast! The website also went live in April.
• In May I was busy creating content, updating and fine-tuning the workbook, ordering goodies for the ladies in my program and working on the business plan. 
• In June I began working with my first courageous woman! I still talk to her today! 
• July and August were dedicated to more podcasts and content creation and another courageous woman!
• In September I had my first ladies night workshop! It was so much fun and further cemented my commitment and love for my passion. 
• October through now…have been a blur. Between holidays, kids, work, and trying to make sure we are all surviving, I focused on social content and a few podcasts.

Those first few months were a HUGE whirlwind and why I say that when you find your nudge it might feel like a freight train! LOL. I loved every minute of it. I wrote major goals for the business and my personal / professional life and what I wanted to accomplish by the end of 2021. Guess what. I did not hit all of them. This is why I brought up the Tony Robbins quote at the beginning of this podcast. I severely overestimated what I could do in a year. Especially since I have never launched a business before, while working full-time as a single mom. HAHAHA! Then I started looking at some of the people I follow and their stories and paths. Guess what. Their careers and lives didn’t sky rocket in a year either. Many took 5-10 years. Yep, that is where I am. I am still in year one! ONE!! I need to slow my goal roll and realize that this will take time. If you remember, I am not a super patient person when it comes to reaching my goals or getting what I want. Once I figure something out, I would like it all right now. But I know that God likes to teach me patience, so I stay consistent. I stay diligent in helping women and building Something Better, My Darling. Tony Robbins, Lewis Howes, Jenna Kutcher, Gabby Bernstein, all of these people I love and follow…they did this too. They had to put in all of the work and passion and stay consistent in serving people. They didn’t do it all in a year either, so why would I think I could? LOL. 

I wanted to talk about this, because as we start a new year I am sure some of you have New Year resolutions. Don’t overestimate what you can do in a year with these either. Give yourself some grace and focus on what you can do each day and where that could take you in 10 years! Don’t focus on the end goal every day. Pick one small thing you can do to reach the end goal. And if it is easier, just focus on one goal at a time. If you haven’t read, “Atomic Habits” by James Clear. I highly recommend it. There are many different types of guidance on how to write and stick to goals. His plan makes the most sense to me. He is a quick rundown of what he suggests. You can also get a cheat sheet and many other resources at atomichabits.com/cheatsheet. I have also loaded just the cheatsheet to my website under resources, or scroll to the bottom of the this transcript.  

The first law by James Clear is: Make it Obvious. 

1. Fill out the Habits Scorecard. Write down your current habits to become aware of them. 
2. Use implementation intentions: “I will [BEHAVIOR] at [TIME] in [LOCATION].” 
3. Use habit stacking: “After [CURRENT HABIT], I will [NEW HABIT].” 
4. Design your environment. Make the cues of good habits obvious and visible.       

The Second Law. Make it Attractive

1. Use temptation bundling. Pair an action you want to do with an action you need to do. 
2. Join a culture where your desired behavior is the normal behavior. 
3. Create a motivation ritual. Do something you enjoy immediately before a difficult habit. 

The Third Law. Make it easy.

1. Reduce friction. Decrease the number of steps between you and your good habits. 
2. Prime the environment. Prepare your environment to make future actions easier. 
3. Master the decisive moment. Optimize the small choices that deliver outsized impact. 
4. Use the Two-Minute Rule. Downscale your habits until they can be done in two minutes or less. 
5. Automate your habits. Invest in technology and one time purchases that lock in future behavior.

The Fourth Law. Make it satisfying. 

1. Use reinforcement. Give yourself an immediate reward when you complete your habit. Make “doing nothing” enjoyable. 
2. When avoiding a bad habit, design a way to see the benefits.
3. Use a habit tracker. Keep track of your habit streak and “don’t break the chain.” Never miss twice. 
4. When you forget to do a habit, make sure you get back on track immediately. 

Of course, your very, very first step is to write down your goals. And, if you’re not sure what the heck you want to be doing, or should be doing. Please don’t hesitate to give me a call, text, or send me an email.